Self-Identity

Where does self-identity come from? How is it formed? I really don't know definitively because where it appears to come from and where it actually comes from are likely two very different things. The apparent source would be our childhood experiences where we 'decided' who we were based on what was going on around us and what we were told about ourselves.

In my work I often invite people to realize that their beliefs about themselves make sense given what was going on in their formative years and how they needed to give it all some kind of meaning and so they came up with the conclusions they arrived at. That's how it appears to work and I see it as helpful in the process of dismantling beliefs so that the space of possibility may be experienced.

I do have to admit, however, that my sense is that we experienced exactly what we were supposed to experience and that continues to be the case throughout our lifetime. Did my Dad leaving when I was three cause me to become so independent or was that the perfect unfolding that would lead me to the concepts I came here to experience? Did the events of the mid 80's that precipitated the end the company I had founded in the late 70's and consequently of my self-identity as 'Vonco' start a whole new journey in my life or was it Life in it's infinite dance moving the energies to create the situation? Could it really have been otherwise?


Just as studies are now showing that the brain lights up with a choice before we become consciously aware of it, by anything from a fraction of a second to a few seconds, I have long wondered if what I call 'me' made any of the decisions of my life or has what I now view as a fictitious 'me' simply been the vehicle of experience for all those 'choices'? I don't have definitive answers for these questions either but am most certainly leaning toward the latter.

So what does this imply in terms of anything we do, including dismantling the illusion? Well, it seems we will either do it or we won't, depending on what we are here to experience. The very idea that we are all here to do some particular thing like become enlightened or to experience love seems fallacious at best and downright ridiculous at the very least. We don't all have those experiences, never have. We don't all wake up, we don't all have cancer, we don't all do anything other than die. This body will eventually run its course, long or short, of that I can be fairly certain, just as this planet will run its course and every other manifestation in this universe. Other than that there seems to be a myriad of experiences being played out and I suspect it's all perfect.

Reflection of Perfection

So in those terms, I would have to say there is nothing to second guess about what has been, nothing to worry about as to where it's all going, there is only the wonder of it all unfolding. We do what we are here to do or not do. We identify ourselves as we do until we don't anymore or until it's time to realize something new. There is a perfection unfolding and we either enjoy it or we don't. These words will either resonate with you or they won't. Are they true? I don't know but I do enjoy seeing perfection reflected throughout creation.